Hate (the real thing)

1a : intense hostility and aversion usually deriving from fear, anger, or sense of injury

  b : extreme dislike or antipathy : loathing <had a great hate of hard work>

So. . . . 

Well . . .  

I have been trying to wrap my brain around the events in Boston, beyond the fact that it is a horrible tragedy. I am a person that has never really outgrown the WHY stage, much to my dearly departed father's chagrin. I am not going to say I have never uttered the words "I hate.....". I think we have all said that and perhaps even believe we feel that, but until September 11th and now the Boston Marathon, I don't think I understood the full depth of that word. Frankly I still don't. I have never hated another person with so much vehemence as to wish them dead on my own personal behalf. I have wished that they were no longer in my immediate life but never gone from this earth. Because while I may have no desire to be in their presence or deal with their drama, there is someone on the planet somewhere that does care about them and their being here. 

I don't believe the same things as everyone, hell, really hardly ANYONE. I believe with my heart and my head. I believe what THEY tell me about people and life. I am pretty good at reading people and situations. And the beauty of MY world is, I don't have to love your life to love you as a friend. We don't have to believe the same. We don't have to think, or act or speak the same.  

So when I see violence perpetrated against everyday people regardless of location here or abroad, I can't wrap my brain around it. The concept is so foreign to me.  The world is HUGE and fiscally we can't survive in our own little kingdoms any more. We are forced to deal with people who think, and feel and believe and smell and eat and do every damn thing differently than we do. But they also do things the same way we do. They have children, and parents and community and beliefs. And if ALL OF THAT IS TRUE and I have been told it is, WHY WOULD WE HATE EACH OTHER ENOUGH FOR THOSE VERY BASIC FACTS OF A SUBSET OF DEFINITIONS OF THEIR BEING TO WISH TO KILL THEM? 

THAT IS WHY I SEE A PHOTO OF AN 8 YEAR OLD LITTLE BOY BEGGING FOR PEACE and know that he is no longer in this would because of ....... what? He might grow up and be a different man with a set of beliefs and values that differ from yours? I can't grasp of that violent emotion so deeply felt that killing people just because they exist is the end result of feeling it.

It makes me think we really are coming to the end of times. At least the end of the age of reason, since this is now part of our lives and is completely irrational. 

I will leave you with this thought.  I spend all of my mental process trying to remember to embrace the good I see around me since we get one ticket to ride. I don't want to think that when my ride ends I spent it looking around hating everywhere I have been and known, and all of the rich colors and textures they brought into my life through out, made it so much more than it could have been if I stayed hidden in hate.